能不能; Is it possible?

I was introduced to this song by Coco Lee after watching a Taiwan Idol Drama, featuring Christopher Lee & Tian Xin, 親愛的,我愛上別人了 (A Good Wife). Perfectly describe my thoughts currently.

愛情降臨了 帶走了 孤寂的沈悶
我朝你狂奔 喔 好深刻 你是否都還記得
當初多認真 相信著 可那真愛呢
被時間拉扯 喔 被鯨吞 殘忍的矛盾

能不能回到過去呢
過去那種快樂 狂熱的愛著
能不能選另一個人
填飽愛的飢渴 脫困了 又然後呢
能不能給我一個吻
不帶一絲冰冷 溫暖我的唇
能不能就繼續放任
讓我們逃避著 逃成了一段永恆 能不能

愛情過期了 舍不得 承認又如何
難道新鮮的 不會受困 誰回答我的疑問
太倚賴感覺 太愚笨 於是改變呢
如果你也能 喔 堅持著 我願意再撐

能不能回到過去呢
過去那種快樂 狂熱的愛著
我們就別再奢求了
會走到這一刻 你和我都該負責
能不能給我一個吻
不帶一絲冰冷 溫暖我的唇
我可以為了你容忍
再多的不可能 如果我們一起呢 能不能

We used to be so in love. Maybe we were young and ignorant. We weren’t affected by the reality of the society. We were just in our own world, talking about feelings and love.

But I am a realist. We drifted as time passes. I set my goals, my targets and strive hard for them, while you continue to catch up. It wouldn’t have mattered if you are working hard, but all I see was reminders after reminders that I have to send you. The constant wake-up calls. It was straining me. It’s impossible to turn back time, it’s impossible for you to become a mature man overnight.

Perhaps I grew too mature for you to handle. That’s probably all I could say.


親愛的,我愛上別人了

親愛的,我愛上別人了

 

At first, when I watched the 1st episode, I thought it was rather boring. But it gets realistic as time passes, as it portrays the daily struggles of couple, family, work and keeping a balance of everything.

The story is about a married wife, who gave up her career to carry out her duties as a wife & daughter-in-law, and how she cope with a workaholic husband who comes from a family of male chauvinists. Both her husband and father-in-law are chauvinists who thinks that married women are to fulfill their duties by staying at home, giving birth and taking care of daily household chores while men strive hard for their career. The wife was one of the top scholar, and she performed better than her husband back in university days, but had to sacrifice her dreams, give up her passion because she’s married. Her husband is a workaholic, who work late everyday, and neglected her. Her parent-in-law are stressing them for babies. She was coping with all these sacrifices and stress until one day, she met a man – who is exact opposite of her husband – brought her to “runaway”; to fight for her dreams and passion. This threatens her once-peaceful married life.

It’s interesting to see how the wife cope with all these stress. I admit I am not someone who will sacrifice my passion, my dream just because I’m married. Women should be respected and given the freedom to pursue a career too.

But what caught my attention in the show was the interaction between the wife and the husband. It reflected me and xx. Each time I watch the drama, I imagined that’s me and xx after marriage – hardly any interactions, cold responses, not knowing what to say to each other and being very unnatural. It’s as though it’s a routine of “Good Morning”, “Have you eaten?”, “How’s your day?”, “Good night”, everyday. As the chinese saying goes, “Sleeping on the same bed, but having different dreams” – in simple words, it just means being together, yet working towards different goal. Because we are already behaving like this now, what will happen if we really get married? I chose to put an end to our relationship because I fear the arrival of this day. Maybe one day, if xx become a different man, and we meet again, still single, things might change.

I just want to be myself, enjoy being loved and loving the man whom is worth my love. I am not rushing, and I shall leave everything to fate.

About 5onefive

crazy. emotional. extrovert. introvert. sociable. unfriendly. i have many sides.
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